Lost Heart

So my ex had explained from the beginning that he had financial problems from mistakes he had made and that he really should not be in a relationship, but we fell in love anyway and got together and it was magical and beautiful.

7 months in he lost his good paying job and he hit a downward spiral of struggling to cope with payments and initially our relationship was compromised a little due to his continuous uncertainty about the future but we had braved it through. However, luck was hardly on his side when the new job he struggled with couldn't help him out at all and he eventually asked me for a break because he needed to sort himself out. It was hard, but I agreed. I accepted the NC.

5 days later I found him at my apartment and he's spent the day at mine and continued to visit frequently for the month which really confused me, but because I was just glad to have him back, I said nothing. Our relationship seemed to have resumed its magic, or maybe even better, and we even celebrated our dating anniversary. Then came Valentine's Day.

He asked for a break after because even though we had a nice lunch together and I went to work after, he texted me saying he's sorry he isn't putting himself in the relationship like he used to, and that he feels he's not the kind of person that wouldn't get me a gift but he didn't. I said I didn't care and that I understood but he said he cared, so we started break #2.

This was more distressing since he called once everyday to tell me things that have happened, and it became worse, like he got dismissed from his job, his tyre popped and stuff that were straining him monetarily again. He was constantly angry, upset, self loathing etc...

So yesterday he saw a psych for the first time, and he felt he needed more financial than emotional help. He told me that he loves me, there's nothing wrong with the relationship or anything wrong with me. The relationship was perfect and so was I, he was truly happy, but right now he doesn't want any of it because his life has hit a point he can no longer handle financially and have started seeking help from his parents and family. He's been pushing me a lot and now he's just called a final one for me to just move on and stop waiting around for the break to end. He also added that he didn't know why but even though he's not one for infidelity or anything he keeps thinking he will want other girls and this won't be enough for him, which was really strange for me to hear, but at least he's being honest.

Well I just really want him back because I can't stand for a relationship that had to die not because we didn't love and support each other. The love and compatibility was true, but circumstance has forced us apart.