My fault?
Hi, I'm new in 7 cups. I'm not feeling okay lately. I broke up with my boyfriend a month ago. We were together for 4 years, but I put an end in our relationship because I wasn't feeling the same. I love him, he was my best friend but I felt like I needed to breath. At the beginning, I was really sure about my decision, it felt like it was the right thing to do. But right now I feel awful.. This last week has felt like hell. I miss him and I don't know if I made a mistake back then; although I feel like we needed a break. Thing is, he doesn't want to talk to me or see me because he is hurt and it's just too difficult to him, and I understand. I want to move on, but at the same time I feel like we should be together. Probably you think it is my fault because it was me who broke up with him. I feel empty... Does this pain last forever?
@SanXVI
First things first; you did nothing wrong. You simply did what felt right at the time. It is pretty much impossible to really control your feelings. They are always changing. Whether or not that was the best decision really depends on how long that lack of attraction lasted. I think everyone goes through brief periods of time where they don't really want to be around someone and want some distance. That's just how some people are, especially if you're an introvert like me. If you are starting to long for that person again then you probably still loved them, you just needed time to with yourself. Heck, I go through it too. It's really frusterating when you've been with someone and you want to be around them 24/7 and then all of a sudden hardly ever. But as long as these periods don't last for that long then you probably could have made it work and eventually the want to be near him would have returned on his own. If he does eventually want to talk explain that to him. That you realized you still had feelings for him but just needed time on your own. Say you'll express that a lot better if it happens again. If he refuses to discuss anything then you really can't say departing was all your fault, because he refuses to make an effort. But at the same time remember that breakups can be very hard on some people, and he seems to be taking it pretty harsh. You may just need to give him some time to cool off a bit. If he still doesn't want to talk about it then there is no use wasting your effort. It was probably best that you split if he isn't even willing to hear you out.
@TaintedHaze Hi, you're right in everything you said. I'm letting him have some space but I'm afraid he will realize he is better without me. Anyway, I guess I'll have to wait.
Thank you so much!
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