Need help saving my marriage
More and more frequently everything that comes up between my wife and myself leads her threatening splitting up. This breaks my heart it is a 30+ year marriage.
That is a tough position you are in. If she started threatening, that is normally not a good sign, sorry for that.
You could sit down with her, tell her how all of this makes you feel. Stay within your self. Just tell how you feel. Do not judge, do not blame. Don not use "but" in sentences. If she is willing to share how she feels, let her and just listen. Do not reply, other than "I understand".
If she is open to it, you might want to consider marriage counseling, to learn to communicate again. It might be to late to save your marriage, it might help though to ease breaking up, if that is unavoidable.
Take care.