No contact rule broken
So after aessy long drawn out break up of 5 weeks i got to the point i had to have a break to heal to continue letting go without his distractions it was a hard decision. We were together gor 4years. So i applied the 'no contact rule'. I explained in detail why I'm doing it and that I'm putting myself 1st and this is for my healing. Anyway i haven't blocked him as part of me still wants to hear what he has say. He continues to text me. Part of me is mad he wont respect my decision like he doesn't care about me especially after i explained so well why i was doing this - thus is whats best fir me. Its only day 2 and i havent replied to his txts. I dont want to. But do i need to tell him again to let me be, let me go.? Do i need to block him? Before i applied the no contact we were trying to work on our relationship but i was still grieving what was and had already sort of let go of our relationship and was so confused whether i wanted to try again thats why i needed this break. I dont know what to do
@plumTiger5814,
Block his number because if you don't ,you'll still feel tempted to look at his messages and this will slow down your process of healing!Don't try to explain your needs to him again,this will make you vulnerable to his attempts to convince you to try and work out the situation.If he cares to listen to what your needs are,he will respect your decision and will give you time and space.Problematic people don't want to be distant from you because they fear they are losing control over you,what if in the meantime you meet another guy and they never see you again?In narcissistic relationships,this process is called "hoovering" - they do it when they sense you have had enough and you are on your way out of the relationship!I feel for you in this situation!Concentrate on your needs,what's best for you and practise self-care every day,do things that give you pleasure and comfort you !
@intellectualCake2979
Thank you i needed to hear that. I feel he had such control over me over the years, using my kindness and empathy to always draw me back in and feel sorry for him (he suffers from depression which he wont seek professional help for hence the break up) he emotionally drains me! Of course i still love him but him continuing to make contact after I've asked him not to is just proving to me how much he disrespects me and only thinks of himself. The guy even had the nerve to say the other night 'I'm finally going to respect your decision for once' that only lasted like 2hours before he started texted again. I'm not quite ready to block him as a little part of me is hoping that this time apart from me and my support will convince him to get the help he needs. He's just text again now 'i hate not hearing from you and what your up to!'. I know I'll probably get to that point I will have to block him. If anything his continuous texts are reminding me why I need to keep moving forward and letting him go.
Thank you for your advice - its spot on and have screenshotted it to remind myself to put myself 1st😊🙏