On The Edge

Hello,

I know that the title of this post sounds desperate, and perhaps it is. I'm feeling at the lowest point of my life guys, and I don't have the strength to move up from it.

I'm 33 and single, never married and no kids. I consider myself a good person, but I recently did something bad, for the first time in my life I did something to hurt someone on purpose.

I had a relationship with this guy who recently broke up with his ex girlfriend. They were together for 8 years. I found out he was still talking to her and we broke up, for a month and a half he still texted me and called me, we bumped to each other at a coffee shop and we started hanging out again. News was, he was going out with his ex girlfriend again. But not in a romantic way he said, although she wanted him back, and they kissed.

And here goes what I did... I made him break up with her, so he'll stay with me. And that is killing me. Because I did it to hurt her.

I feel like the most horrible person in the world, and I cant cope with my guilt. Im not with him anymore, and I told him what I did. The reason I'm not with him is because he feels like he hurts me, but I know that at the bottom, he does not want to be with me and I pushed things.

So... that's me.