On a break

Some background. I met this guy last year. Things moved quickly. We work together. There's an age gap and he has two older children from a previous relationship. In the time we were together lots happened, I lost family members and it took its toll on us. Things gradually became more and more tense but I truly love this man. We had a discussion about breaking up but I suggested we just start seeing eachother and take the pressure off. We speak daily and obviously work together. We hang out, sleep together, I hang out with his children but affection has become awkward. Sometimes we get relaxed and say old pet names and sweet things but it's like we're both scared to intitate anything. I don't know what to do. He's avoidant and carries a lot of trauma with emotions. Whereas I'm very anxious and have only been in abusive relationships really. We agreed to not see other people and he asks if I'm talking to anyone else and I do vice versa. I'm not sure where to go with this. He said this is the most emotionally open he's been with anyone, that I bring out that side. I'm making a conscious effort to see friends, work on myself, go to therapy.