Over in a flash

I'm usually not good at sharing my feelings. I don't like to feel vulnerable. But this hurt me so bad I am looking to anybody who's willing to listen to get me out of this dark place.

My ex girlfriend and I had been going out for just under a year, and everything was going really well up until this last month. In this last month she became much more distant and usery. She was constantly asking for favors, she's a nursing student, so she had me reading all of her papers, making charts for her projects, buying food for her and bringing it to the hospital for her and her co workers. Sounds innocent enough, but then she would get home (we lived together for 9 months) and I was utterly ignored. I love yous were never reciprocated. I wasn't allowed to give her so much as a hug. Then one night it all comes out. She says she wants to move out, she's tired of living like an old couple and wants to be a typical 21 year old. I was fine with that, even encouraged her to go out. But that wasn;t good enough, she said she'd been unhappy for a month, and no longer loved me and that she was fantasizing about other people. I told her that I needed to process all of this and decided to go home to my parents for the day. When I got back she had taken most of her stuff and moved in with a friend. She says she still cares about me and I still love her very much but I just want to get past her. I did everything for her too, I made her all of her meals, did any work for her if she asked I did it, no matter hoe big or small the task. I feel like my emotions were never considered. I wasn't really even aware of any problems until everything had already ended. I feel like I was used.

I've never been anybody's first choice, always a fallback always the knock off, with friends relationships all of it. She finally made me feel like I was somebidy's number one but I guess it was all an illusion.