What am I doing
Boyfriend of 11 years recently decided to break up with me. We have 2 children together. Recently found out hes been seeing another woman. She decided one night to blow up his phone via Snapchat, text and Facebook all within a few minutes of eachother. So of course I decided to check his phone ( I know I should have respected his privacy) but I was caught a little off guard. So checked it and seen that she sent him a message saying I miss you and I had fun with you in Vegas. I dont know how serious he is about this person and sometimes he tries to make it seem like shes nothing. But now he constantly ignores my calls and texts. Making me feel like a crazy person. He also lost his mother a few hours after our son was born (3 years ago). I know that has been having an affect on our relationship as well, and Ive never seen him really grieve it seems like hes been holding it all in. Him and his mom were very very close. I just want him to be okay and I want him to know that I will always be there for him and that Im hurting as well. I cant take him ignoring me. I feel like my mind is all over the place and Ive been having panic attacks and all I want is for him to be here for me. And he wants nothing to do with me. He says he loves our kids but if I wasnt the one calling him and asking to come over sometimes I dont even think hed bother being around. My kids deserve a father that would be anything for them. I wish he would just not let whats going on with us affect them.
@decisiveFriend8674 You seem really upset . I can imagine you feeling helpless and disappointed right now, not knowing how to fix things and longing for his presence in your life. You've stood strong for yourself and your kids and you care a lot about him though you feel its not reciprocated at present. Its amazing you're able to do that. All of these can get very overwhelming for you, and its totally understandable you are getting panic attacks etc. Its good that you are sharing it here, requires courage-so hugs for that ! As much as you care for your partner and kids, you need to care for yourself too. So, it might be a good idea to have an open conversation on this so that expectations can be alligned, misunderstandings cleared and may be get closer yet again.
