What to do??
Been married for 13 years. Last 6 months have been rocky. Spoouse was unfaithful about 2 years ago and I still hold on to that. This week she told me she’s not sure where she is at with our marriage. Has told me she sees a different look when I look at her almost as if I’m disgusted by her. I do t feel that as I’m very much in love with her. She asked for space but I have come to realize that in the past , space only allows for more space to be created. She has asked for therapy but it hasn’t been until now that I’ve been willing or ready for that. I hope it’s not too late. She has put up a wall and I’m not sure how to get her to bring it down. I’m not ready to throw in the towel as I feel marriage isn’t something you quit. It takes work, hard work. It takes struggle and lots of patience. How do I get her to realize that and keep fighting?
The way you feel is totally valid, it can be extremely hard to overcome infidelity. If you want to move forward, therapy may not be such a bad idea. Possibly both individually and together? When you decide to continue a relationship after trust has been broken, it’s not fair to hold on to what broke the trust. If it were something you can not move past, the best option would be to part ways. Only because it’s unfair to both parties involved and the broken trust will only be a breeding ground for resentment as the relationship continues. It may not be worth it to make her realize anything, you too are a prize and deserve happiness. She can not be responsible for your happiness, nor is what happens next up to one person. Try taking up a new hobby or exercise to become the best version of you while seeking mental clarity on this situation
