When a person says maybe we will cross paths again. Do they actually mean it?
This is what a guy said to me
Maybe we will cross paths in the future but for now go find someone who makes you happy that’s not me.
I won’t dismiss the possibility in the future but I need to find my own way right now and I don’t wanna have you wait on me while I’m in this process of my life.
I know sometimes people say maybe the future to soften the blow. But is it possible that people can actually mean this?
We dated over the summer yes I know thats not long. It felt like something I've never exprienced before. But he was hot and cold and I think it was because of self worth issues). When we first met he was in AA and he told me there was a time when he did not love himself. And if I am completely honest I was not ready for a serious relationship. Which I feel like he really wanted (despite him being hot and cold. I sent him a letter apologizing for how I have treated him. And we have talked since then. But I have been talking to other men on dating apps.
@Lisaxlove
Hello. I remember some people in my past life told me I had been special and I had deserved someone special, too ("but it wasn't her"), or people saying that "maybe we will cross paths again". But they rarely do. And mostly I had never heard of these people again.
Just a polite way to end a connection, I think, with some intention to do as little harm to another person as possible (though not always working like that...).
You said this man has been in AA. Maybe that is the key to the whole story? He may suffer from guilt and low self-esteem. To remain sober he may need to stay mindful and calm, and avoid any emotional rollercoasters (which are not so uncommon in relationships). And sometimes it may take time to forgive yourself and start believing in yourself again.
Some AA members say: "For your sobriety you need just two things: some job to be done and someone to love." But maybe he isn't in this stage yet?
Speaking about him being "hot and cold", there might be various things behind it - from painful childhood experience to some other serious issues or traumas, which take time to recover.
For me it looks like he said he wasn't ready yet. And preferred the risk of being cruel rather than giving you any false hope...
@jacek73 Thank you for your input. Yeah, I understand that he did not want to hurt me. Some people do in fact reconnect. But perhaps everyone is different. He made it seem like everything was going ok with him. With AA he did have a slip up but I did not think anything of it. I would be open to us being together in the future. He did have issues with his self esteem and he also had trust issues.
