cheated on and struggling to move on!
I was in a relationship for almost 6 months , although it wasnt the longest time , it was my first real relationship and im struggling to move on. When both on seperate holidays i had discovered this person had gotten drunk , high, and made out with another person, obviously i broke it off instantly but it was extremely hard to just let go of everything we had built over the 6 months. Although 4 weeks have already passed since it has happened, and i can feel myself slowly moving on, i cant seem to fully let go and feel at peace. I know i deserved better, i know this person was never good for me and i know the entirety of our relationship i was blinded and put up with too much, but despite knowing all of this , i cant move on and stop the thoughts. Ive been trying to distract myself and spend all my time with friends and family but i can never stop thinking, all the good times, all the memories, even seeing this persons name holds me back from moving on. Everytime i think im over it, something will happen and i will feel so hurt again, i should be over it by now , but im not and i dont even know why.Idk what i want out of posting this , maybe some moving on tips? or someone to talk to that has been through a similiar thing, idk but if you have read this thx!!
@glisteninghope
The best thing I have found is to imporove yourself, mentally and physically... take time doing things YOU want to do, keep occupied... I can relate on the basis that my (soon to be ex wife) left me and I too have had to find coping mechanisms so i can't have time to be sad and depressed ( we would have been married 3 yrs this yr) and now a couple months later, I am FINALLY at terms of where things are and I am becoming happier than i ever was with her, because I have rediscoverred what it means to be happy, albiet alone.
hey thanks heap for your response, i am also sorry for what youre going through but am happy you are becoming happier again , good luck with everything :))
@Vloth
@glisteninghope
Hi there!
I am sorry you had this experience.Break-ups are never fun..i can suggest that you try to take every day as 1 day it just takes time and patience and self-compassion and self-care. Be good to yourself. It can works wonders;)
If you would like to chat further you can PM me or any of the other listeners in here
Wishing you all the best 
hey thank you for your loving compassionate response, means a lot x
@caringLight
@glisteninghope hi there, i'm sorry to hear that you found out they cheated on you. that wasn't fair to you and i am glad you decided to end it. you deserve to be treated better than that. it sounds like you need time to heal. 4 weeks really isn't that long if you think about how long it took for you to fall for them and depending how much time you spent together. i know it is tough but time and distance away from that person really do help. i think don't rush yourself to heal. healing is a process and as each day goes by, it will become more and more clear why you left and what you really deserve and then you will begin to look back less and less. the hurt he put you through is still pretty fresh. i think the best thing is to focus on you - do something you've always wanted to do, learn a new skill, do something you enjoy, fill your time with things you enjoy and people that make you feel good. you are so strong for getting this far, keep it up. it will get easier and please know that you are not alone. i was also cheated on and made a clean break but it wasn't easy. i hope this helps. stay strong and happy healing xo
@glisteninghope
hello! i am sorry to hear of your situation! many have replied to you already so i can only add to the wonderful things they ve said...
1.usually under those circumstances our self worth is destroyed..dont ever do that to you! focus on your strengths and the positive aspects of you! even write them down and ask your friends to add things to the list...self love and self respect are the keys to hapinness something that ony you can give to yourself!
2.cry when you want to cry! dont let your emotions inside!release the sadness you may feel and dont supress yourself!
I am too in a really hard break up of my 6 months bf...it hurts like hell! but only time can heal us completely and will even if we dont believe it now!patience is the only way to make it through! lots of love!! <3
@glisteninghope
@glisteninghope
I understand your pain. I've been in a relationship with my fiance for 1.5 years now...and have been dealing with virtual indifelidty off and on the entire time...even up until 2 days after my last birthday not even a month ago. It's incredibly painful and I have days where I want to run as far away as possible...but end up staying, for reasons I'm not entirely even sure of. But....have you had a conversation with this person? An HONEST conversation? Where you both respectfully talk about your hurt, and maybe his/hers and how you both can overcome/get over it? I am still with my fiance and we have plans to be married next month. Belive me. I have doubt daily. I am trying to take the time to regain trust in him, and we HAVE had this discussion I asked you about above. That conversation can be more easily had, and can be more realiable in terms of honesty with the other person, when you're no longer together. Nothing to lose at that point you know? You're already not together, so at least be respectful to one another NOW and take a couple of hours so you both can move on.
It's is very hard when someone you love and respected chooses to betray you but then again that is not your fault. What they decided to doid their choice and you don't have to punish yourself for it. Take your time, do things you love, eat amazing food, listen to music and then slowly let go of that toxicity in your life. <3