insecurities and bad thoughts
I'm afraid I need to end my relationship. I hate myself too much and I'm too insecure to trust my partner. I'm too insecure to feel comfortable about a partner staying faithful to me. My partner cheated on me once a long time ago, telling me that he hated himself and had insecurities. But him cheating on me destroyed my self esteem and I don't think I can take it any longer. I don't want to feel uncomfortable with myself any longer and I can't tell any close.
I understand how you feel. My triggers get to me everytime a bad memory pops up bcuz I see something that reminds me of how she hurt me. We're together but I'm struggling trying to trust her and my heart breaks everytime I want to ask about something bcuz something triggered me.
She's not affectionate like me and our love language is totally different so I can't tell if she wants to really be in a relationship with me or it's she comfortable and convenient bcuz she may feel that she can still be sneaky when I'm not around. I really hate to think that way bcuz its such a energy waster.
But the past of the toxic relationship has really put me in a place of insecurities and not a whole lot of confidence that I once had. It's been difficult to walk away and truly stay away bcuz the love that I have for her.
