it’s hard to go through a breakup

I was in a committed relationship for over 2 years and he recently broke up with me while studying abroad. We both had our issues equally. However, I feel like I was the sole reason driving us apart. I frequently self sabatoged any happiness that was apparent. I brought up past mistakes that he made and often found myself criticizing a lot that he’s done for me.

It’s been about a month and I’ve been self reflecting and really thinking about what’s now gone. He was my bestfriend and partner that I wanted to do life with for a very long time.

I’ve been faking my happiness over the past few weeks and trying my best to be ok, but many other factors including school are driving me to the edge and it’s hard to manage all these emotions at once. I’m self aware of my mistakes and it hurts to have made someone I care about lose faith in me and give up on me. I think I’m really struggling with myself and how bad of a person I am to have driven us apart that way.

Nevertheless, I’m relieved that he is now able to be happy and flourish.