Empty box of Valentines
I remember an episode from The Simpsons about Valentine's day; Everyone in Lisa's classroom was giving and receiving cards, but Ralph Wiggum was left out. I knew how he felt, ever since I changed schools. At my old elementary, we would give people candy and cards, and no one was left out. Sadly, after I moved away, no one celebrated Valentine's day, anymore, and the only thing I received was hate from bullies.
I kept hoping that a boy would like me and we would love each other forever, but that day never came. A year ago, I finally got to celebrate February 14 with a guy who claimed he loved me. Even though he flaunted me around in a "look at what I did" kind of way and I found out that he played me like a fool, I still liked that day, because I got to feel loved and appreciated. Just for that day.
Four months ago, I had a relationship end with a great guy and it was, and is, one of my biggest regrets. I want to celebrate Valentine's day with him, but that's wishful thinking. Now I feel like Ralph Wiggum, because I am going to be without love, again, and it hurts. I wish I didn't have a huge hole in my heart, but I have to accept that my bag or box won't be filled with a single Valentine. 
Your post moved me deeply. I am so very sorry for your sadness. For what it's worth, you are alright just the way you are right now. You don't need anyone to complete you. I'm sure you cannot imagine the number of people, many of whom you may never have known, who remember 'that person' that may have smiled at me. Try to show yourself patience. At times, it may be an uphill path, but (I believe at least) it is a joyful path.
Remain courageous
Thank you, @JeffWM. I'm really glad you read it. I wasn't sure if I should have written it out or not, but I'm glad I did. It's very moving to have positivity and support in unlikely places, such as this website. I wish you a great night and a joyous lifetime. 
@ RedPandaExpress88 I can't tell you how many letters I've written that I never planned to send. For me, writing is a way of clearing my mind. Do me one favor. Go onto YouTube and look up, and of course watch, a few Mr. Rogers shows. What amazes me the older I get is that Mr. Rogers wasn't an 'act'. That's how he was. That's how I aspire to be!
I am genuinely happy you posted. I was genuinely saddened by your words. I am genuinely happy that (by chance) my words struck a chord with you! ;)
@JeffWM I wish I could watch Mr. Rogers, but it reminds me of an ex-friend of mine. He said the same thing you said, at a time when we were kind of close. Now we are in a complicated place, with it being too late for us to talk about what happened, and me not responding to him unless I have to. With my heart full of different emotions and feelings, including further heartbreak, it is difficult for me to trust and forgive him, again. I still appreciate your kindness and I admire your inspiration to be like Mr. Rogers. I hope that, some day, I will be able to honor your favor and watch it with an open heart. 
*gentle, virtual hugs* going your way.
Cathy
@defatbroad
Thank you, Cathy. I will definitely need it, today. ☹
Happy Valentines Day, RedPandaExpress88 👧 Sending 💗 love & a hug 🙇 to you on this February 14th. I'm so sorry about your recent break up. I have spent every Valentines Day as a single, "unattached" female, but I always have tried to focus on the people in my life that do care about me, and love me instead of turning Valentine's Day into "SINGLE AWARENESS DAY." Being single on Valentines Day is far preferable that being in a relationship with the wrong kind of person, or in a relationship that just doesn't work.
I pray, RedPandaExpress, that you will become comfortable on your own, in your own skin, and grow to love yourself more to fill the void you presently feel. I actually have grown to love being single. I have a lot of male friends whose company I enjoy even though it's minus the romance factor. There is beauty and cherishable value in every relationship, romantic, or not.
I spent years hoping the "right" man would come into my life, & be the love of my life. But this year, I finally decided that it was better to go out in the world and love as many people as I could instead of sitting home alone hoping my romantic relationship status would change. I do a lot of volunteer work with the homeless and low-income population, and am helping teach young children to love books and reading at "Read to Succeed" (a community-based literacy program), and it is so rewarding and fulfilling. Give volunteer work a try, RedPandaExpress, the love you give out has a funny way of boomeranging backatcha 😊
Because of the mention of him in this thread, I leave you this Valentines Day with a quote from Mr. Fred Rogers.
'If only you could sense how important you are to the lives of those you meet; how important you can be to people you may never even dream of. There is something of yourself that you leave at every meeting with another person.
– Fred Rogers
Thank you, @caterpillargirl
I'm sorry for not replying to you sooner. A lot has happened, emotionally, since I wrote this and I didn't want to write the wrong thing. I think that it is nice of you to help others. You sound strong and independent, which are admirable traits. I still have a lot of self-improvement to do, before I can be a better person.
@RedPandaExpress88
I'm still thinking of you and hoping you find peace quickly.
@JeffWM
Thank you. You are a very kind man who I wish I could hug. I really need the peace. 😐
@RedPandaExpress88
I hope you find peace within yourself. Always remember that no one gave you peace, so don't give it away.
Perhaps this is difficult, or impossible to answer, but, "what would your definition of 'peace' be? I honestly think many wouldn't know it if it grabbed them by the hand.
@JeffWM
I don't really know what peace is....I always thought it was like love or happiness; Easier for others, but unobtainable for me. Maybe peace is contentment or the freedom from heartache, headaches, and overall, misery within. I have wondered what that would be like, for years now? To not feel like your past is going to destroy your future and the lives of others around you. Is peace like that really possible?
@RedPandaExpress88
I deeply believe that we can all know peace. Defining peace isn't easy at all! Recognizing what doesn't bring you peace narrows it down a lot ! It's not all the things, that although do not cause us pain, that we resort to try and alleviate suffering: alcohol, food, sex, companionship… When we look, none of those things bring us lasting peace. I believe that peace comes from within. When you realize what is important and what is unimportant it sure helps. We tend to worry about what people, who we don't like or care about, think about us. It's rather ironic isn't it? Do you have any thoughts?
@JeffWM
I think you're right. Peace does come from within and in other to have it, I need to accept myself for who I am and to love myself. You and a listener friend of mine have taught me that and I thank you both for it. Thank you for caring, Jeff. May you have peace within you, always. 😏
@RedPandaExpress88
Now, these are just my thoughts. (Your mileage may very well vary!) Smile at people. You may make their day, or at least, confuse them. Try to remember that the difference between life & death is just one breath. (I know this isn't perfect science but I'm old, so just get off my lawn!) Our lives are so very fragile. The fact that we stay alive from moment to moment is nothing short of amazing. Christian folklore has a story of Saint Stephen who went off into caves for a lengthy period in order to pray / meditate. When his followers found him, there were skulls painted at the entrance to the cave. Saint Stephen explained that this was so that he could better remember that every moment is precious.
As much as you are suffering, is it in any way possible you could, in some tiny way, reach out and do some random act of kindness? It's amazing how good it makes you feel.
Enough of me rambling on. I have to chase some more kids off my lawn! Be well.