Best friend or more?
So I've known this girl for 4 years and ever since we met, we were very close. I know that there was something between us in the beginning (she made me a few hickeys), we were kinda dating, hanging out together etc but I was too scared to make a move because we were in the same class in the high school and she was/is my first real love. 2 years into our friendship/relationship, I confessed to her but she said she didn't want to lose me as a friend and that she doesn't want a relationship FOR NOW. Now, 1 year after the end of the high school, we study at different universities, in different countries in Europe but because everything is online, we still live in the same city and still hang around every few days. Idea of us came back to my mind and I can't sleep because of it. Neither of us were in any relationship in the high school. I am confused what to do. I really want to tell her everything but I am afraid things between us won't be the same after that. I am 100% we could work out everything but I am not sure if she thinks that as well. I am overthinking everything and I hate that feeling and I think she sees something is 'wrong' these days. Can someone give me any advice? Btw sorry if there are grammar mistakes, English isn't my native language.
So basically you want to tell her how you feel but afraid to destroy your friendship,right?
Yes, more or less
@Rek27 I think u could try to tell her but have to be mindful that she may not feel the same or she maybe she will.
I understand that but I don't know how to tell her. If she says no, then I won't be able to be very close to her anymore, I wouldn't be able to watch her be in other relationships. And then I don't know how to distance myself from her without hurting her.