Did I go about it the wrong way?
Usually when someone is rude to me I m rude back. If I sense some negative energy I might give you an attitude. This is the type of energy I have been getting from my husband. Whenever I treat him the way he treats me he starts to overreact calling me names and such. He says I'm just trying to argue. I feel no love from this man. He claims he loves me but doesn't show it. Tells me he will do better but doesn't show it. I understand we all need to vent sometimes from our every day lives but that's the only thing he does, complain. Tell me something good for once.
@loyalLime4514 Rudeness in response to rudeness probably won’t get the response you are after. It’s likely to keep you in the same cycle. That being said, it isn’t right that your husband is being rude to you and it is totally understandable that you would feel hurt or defensive. If you change the way you respond it may help, but changing that may take some focused work.
@loyalLime4514
Sorry to hear your current communication with your husband is causing so much stress. I'll try to put down my thoughts on what you have shared.
Usually when someone is rude to me I m rude back. (We can choose to lead by example. If we'd like someone to change their behaviour, we can calmly demonstrate how it's done rather than validating their bad behaviour by joining them at it) If I sense some negative energy I might give you an attitude. This is the type of energy I have been getting from my husband. (some people just have not yet learnt how to handle or communicate negative thoughts or emotions. It doesn't necessarily make them bad people, just bad communicators with much to learn) Whenever I treat him the way he treats me he starts to overreact calling me names and such. He says I'm just trying to argue. I feel no love from this man. He claims he loves me but doesn't show it. Tells me he will do better but doesn't show it. (if you were to clarify what he can do/say differently to show you love, do you think he would put in the effort?) I understand we all need to vent sometimes from our every day lives but that's the only thing he does, complain. Tell me something good for once. (This. Exactly this. is the crux of the matter. The balance is missing between positive and difficult conversations. They descend into unpleasant arguments because the mutual trust of being on the same team has been forgotten somewhere along the way. In a marriage, it is natural to have some differences of opinions, values, thoughts etc .. there is no winner when you are on opposite sides of the battle rather than coming together to solve the situation)
Much strength and peace to you