Help?
Me and my fiance have been together for nearly 4 years and recently we have moved in to a room at our friends place together after living at his aunts. We have been snapping at each other constantly. We never used to fight ever until we moved into his aunts and its still continuing. He's a very social person and always needs different people to hang out, and I'm not I could hang out with him all day everyday- or clingy if you will. We have had some issues in the past and we are both struggling with slight trust issues, although we have gotten past that part of our life. Anyway, we had a talk and his commitment issues are getting to him again and he has a feeling if things continue like they are, things aren't going to work out. So how do I fix this?
I think there’s a deeper issue that is not talked about here. Like he did something that you don’t like and it wasn’t solved or talked about, which causes the snapping all the time. There’s underlying issues that made you guys keeping scores, and lead to resentment. This has to be talked about to clear the negative emotions brewing in the relationship.
About his needs to be social that is contradicting with you, I think maybe you have to have a talk with him about how you like more time together. There’s trick in communicating— don’t blame or attack. Use “I” statement to avoid blaming. And appreciate what he did to please you. Sometimes when things are bad, we too focused on the bad things instead of the good one. Be vulnerable and honest with what you’re feeling about things that happening between you two. I believe he loves you because you’re his fiancé. Tell him what you need and how he can meet your needs. Compromise. Meet his needs as well.
Relationship is something beautiful and it can make us crazy sometimes. But usually it worth it. Wishing you love and happiness :)
