I just need to rant and i need advice on what to do next

i am currently a junior in high school and i am having problems with well i guess you could say dating and both friendships also? and a bit of depression


i am 16 a junior in highschool and recently iv been having problems 

let me start from all the way back.


iv had a lot of death in my life so im used to it by now. my mother passed when i was sick due to a massive seizure or i dont know exactly what its called. and my father died to a gunshot wound by my own grandfather on nov 23 2017 

anyway after my fathers death i was not really traumatized but more or less emotionless from there on out.

eventually i got a ps4 as a birthday gift and played on it eveyday. i then met a few friends and met a girl named caitlyn. she was a great sweet and very kind person. i developed a crush on her but was wayy to scared to say anything. eventually after 3 of my friends dated her and a bit more talking i asked her out. she said yes and for 2 years it was more or less on and off because of school. i was really lonely throught the time. i had friends but i missed her

so on july 6th 2022 i got the smart idea to prank her with her photos by giving them to a friend and then she of course flipped out . i dont blame her though we broke up and i tried to apolgize but to no avial 

a year later i was quite depressed but when i paired up with 2 people named james and anniemae 

they were kind people and i really enjoyed talking to them. i wanted to become friends but i instead isolated myself. i regretted my choice after the semester was finished and when i saw anniemae in my 2nd peroid this year. i was overjoyed but for 5 weeks i kept telling myself to not talk to her. but on week 6 i got the guts and asked her to be my friend. and she said yes 

i got back into contact with james and we all talked a little over 2 or 1 week in i developed a crush on her. it wasnt her looks i mean she was very cute but i barley knew her so it wasnt her personality. im not sure what it was but i just really really liked her. eventually james told me she was his ex and i got a bit hesitant since the day before that i asked her out but she said she would think about it. i tried to isolate myself again but knocked some sense into me and pushed on

that thursday i felt sick and since she wasnt there i had no reason to stay so i went home. while i was waiting she approched me. (i never talked to her in person mostly over text inside of class since i was such a coward) i handed her a drawing i did earlier that day and we talked while i waited since she was late and just wanted to ditch class. 

her voice was very beautiful and i just coudlnt stop listening to her but eventually my ride came and i went home. 

while i was laying in bed texting her she told me she had just broke up with her girlfriend. at the time i didnt know she was bi not like it was a problem but it just was a shock since i did ask her out.

it went agaisnt my morals so i gave her some advice on creating a plan to get her ex back. not sure if it worked but oh well

currently we are talking im not exactly sure what i should do now. im kinda stuck