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I'm the type of person who would always put my friends's happiness and needs before my own. it's just something I have stuck with. I have been going through a really hard time lately but I feel like I talked about to to one of my best friends, I may just bother them or annoy them (say if we were just talking a little bit ago) and I don't want to be a burden to their happiness. And I have started to feel like it would be best for everyone if I just closed myself up again, so I don't bother anyone and they can be happy. My problems probably aren't that big of a deal and are probably annoying them anyway. I need to put them first again (it's just a habit again).
@smolstrawberries
Hey there, I can totally understand and very much relate to your problem. You said that you find it difficult to open up to your friends because you don't want to bother them. There could be many reasons for this. I guess it's just a personality trait where some people are scared to push away their close ones.
You've already crossed the first step which is realising that you're beong closed off towards your friends from the fear that they might feel annoyed or you'd be affecting their happiness.
I would also like to point out here that your problems are very much of a big deal if they are affecting you in any way and I'm sure that your friends would care about it and want to know about it.
Maybe you can try talking to your friends about your issues with opening up to them and they might give you some reassurance which can help. It's totally upto you what you do about this but this is a genuine problem and I'm glad that you're working on it.
Good luck and take care :)