Confused
Ehm hi im new in here :)
So i have kinda weird question i guess, so my friend is really nice to me but everytime when Im with her she mostly talks about herself and what she likes,she doesnt really care about what i like so I feel like its usseles to talk about things that i enjoy, she is also so negative all the time like i know she got some problems and Im always here for her when she needs to talk and i want support her and make her feel better but I think most of the time that she doesnt care what am i telling her, i mean i got problems too but i dont wanna bother her :/, mostly she doesnt respect when i say no because i kinda have strict parents and when i cant go with her for example on a trip she always asks me why and why, she said that my mum is so bad and i know that she knows well my mum how she is and always asks me why i cant go with her and i know its minda weird but it gives me anxiety and then Im so stressed...When Im talking to my other friend she always come up to us and asks about what we are talking like i mean not in a good way...then i feel like i have no space and i cant be around other people because she then feels like she is being ignored when i dont talk with her but with my other friend...and last thing that i want to say that always when i hang out with her i feel so put of energy amd literally so drained...i really dont wanna be the bad friend because i care about my friends so much and i really apreciate them. What should i do with this friendship? ( and sorry for my
@sorryforbotheringtho
Hi and welcome!
It sounds like your friend hasn't learned how to listen well. That is pretty common. It is a skill that many people don't learn early in life. Sometimes it hides underlying anxieties or issues, sometimes not. It might be completely unconscious behaviour, so she doesn't realise she is doing it. It is a lot of pressure to put onto one person, as you have found.
We can't expect one person to be able to be perfect for us in every way. It sounds like you need someone to listen to you sometimes, so maybe finding other friends to add to your circle could be helpful. She also might need some other friends? It sounds like she really wants someone to go on trips with her but might not have anyone else, and so pressures you.
Could you chat about this with her...point out that she wants someone to go on trips but you can't, and you are feeling stressed about not being able to make her happy. Brainstorm together ways she can meet other people so she has more friends. This might take the pressure off you?
She might be insecure and so feels threatened when she sees you speaking to others?