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Cut off?

User Profile: smolstrawberries
smolstrawberries September 22nd, 2020

I'm in bir of a situation right now. so I met this girl through one of my friends in a group chat and she messaged me privately, because she has stuff going on and she needs do talk about it (I met her around 3 days ago) and I of course said yes, because I love helping people and making them feel safe. So at first it was fine, just her casually talking about her stress. but it started to become a everyday thing. Her constantly talking about her problems, making me feel bad if I had to go to sleep or do school or couldn't FaceTime. And I'm trying to be supportive and see it from her pov. But I started to get mentally tired, because I was putting all of my focus onto her and ignoring my mental health and the signs of my mental health getting very bad. I thought I was being insensitive if I focused on my mental health for a second instead of helping her. I now feel like a therapist to her and I've tried to give her places she can go to so she doesn't feel alone and I understand being scared to reach out. I don't know if I should slowly stop talking to her, since it's emotionally draining me, because she never really asks me how I am and it's just the same thing over and over again and making me feel guilty if I have to do something instead of listening. do I slowly get her out of my life or continue listening to her. I don't want to be a bad person

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User Profile: FoxPrince
FoxPrince September 22nd, 2020

@smolstrawberries you definitely don't have to keep listening to her if it's negatively impacting you, but why not just be honest with her? You don't have to slowly slink away, you could always just say how you're not in a great place to be supporting her, how you feel she's being overly dependant on you and how that's putting stress on you, and how it feels like a one-way support. I guess if that doesn't go well then you could just slowly stop responding, but I never see a reason not to give honesty a try first