Don't know what I'm doing
Does anyone have suggestions on how to find friends? I've recently moved here (~7 months now) and I'm having trouble finding any friends. I've been in this situation a few times before, but those tricks aren't helping this time. In the past I've met some friends through school, and others through a meetup group. But here, no one wants to drive more than 20min or look to expand their circle of friends.
I wish I was normal, I bet this would be loads easier. Alas I'm a geek who enjoys science, Anime, books, & board games; I'm actually quite happy about who I am but it does make it difficult to meet people here. Most groups I've found in the area are for religion, outdoors stuff, or aren't active anymore.
I just wish.... I'm so tired of trying and trying and trying and getting nowhere. Maybe I can invite some people to hang out at my place, but the idea of being a host is so foreign. I never know what food to have, music or movie to have playing in the background, or even how to do the small talk thing. I am SO AWKWARD!!! I hate being alone so much, it's hurts.
Bet this post goes unnoticed too. Ah well, guess I'll just have to do this on my own like always. Always me, I'm the one who doesn't need help, I'm their knight in shining armor, I have it all, I know the correct logical answer, I.... I've found ways to survive but I'm still lost and lonely, confused and hurt by the world around me.
@Monstrous1970
Your post has been noticed by me! I wish I had something intelligent to say. I'm going to be 53 and even though I'm married, I am still alone. My work, for the most part, is either without adult interaction or without face to face interaction.
It's not easy, but it's not impossible. Before I was married and had children, I did a fair amount of volunteering and found it very fulfilling.
@Monstrous1970
Hi. Making friends can be hard even for the most social people. Meeting people that you truly click with and have common interests and values can be tough. Are there any clubs at the local library? Any comic book stores that have any meet ups? Hosting can be fun and doesnt have to be stressful. Just have some finger foods (veggies and dip, chips, chex mix, maybe a dip, etc) and you can more ideas on the internet. You dont have to do music. Maybe have a game night where people pick what board games they want to play so you can chat while you have an activity. Keep looking, you will find your tribe!
@Monstrous1970 First off, thank you for reaching out on 7Cups. I try to remind everyone that any little step - even if it's just chatting on an online community - is a step towards progress, and you should be proud of that.
I can definitely understand feeling lost in a new city. After you graduate from school, it becomes so hard because everyone is already settled into their own groups of friends. It can definitely be hard to strike out and find where you fit in.
The idea of inviting some people to come by and hang out isn't a bad one. Don't feel pressured to always have a plan and a schedule of what to do! You can even make it a potluck and suggest that each person bring 1) a food item to share, and 2) something to do! Maybe one of your guests will end up introducing everyone to a board game or a card game they like. Maybe someone will bring their puppy and you guys can enjoy and laugh and play with it. Maybe someone brings a really great movie you can all watch. It might help to take the pressure off of you from having to plan everything, and it would also let you learn more about what your friends' interests are.
Also, as a fellow anime/science/gaming geek, I can tell you that this is NOT abnormal :) Feel free to message me anytime, even if it's to just nerd out about random topics. I've been looking for a good tabletop game to play for some time - what would you recommend? The last one I played was Warhammer, and it was WAY too complicated for my tastes :(