In love with my friend

Hello! Advice please.

This girl I've been friends with for a few years is great in every way. We told each other everything until I ruined that; just after I realized I have feelings for her, someone else confessed their feelings for me. I thought she and I would only ever be friends so I told her when this person confessed to me, and this amazing girl actually told me she had feelings for me too. However, I was terrified to lose her as my friend if we dated so I chose the other person.

Things between us got increasingly awkward as we didn't know how to act around each other anymore. She feels emotions harder than I do so she told me she couldn't talk to me for a while. I want her to be happy so I let her do what she thought she needed even though I could hear her tears on the phone. I've never made anyone cry and didn't think I even had the power to make someone do so.

After a few months, the girl I'm in love with and I have barely talked, and the person I dated dumped me for a dumb reason, but I was happy because I finally felt free to try talking to the great girl. Unfortunately my choice hurt her so badly that she doesn't trust me as well as she did. Still, because we missed each other and she is willing to be friends again, I want to regain her trust.

My problem is this: despite my patience and consistency in trying to be her friend, I have never been more in love with anyone. How do I stifle my feelings to fulfill her wishes until she is ready for a relationship?