I wish I could have done things better

I am a soon to be senior. I am a total band geek lol, I play the flute/piccolo. And well my junior year I struggled to get along with people in the band. At first people were just getting to know me especially the underclassmen. And so I got a little too comfortable and started I guess being myself a bit. Or at least I don't know why I started acting this way. I started cursing and being immature when it was time to be serious. I always snapped at people and being super impatient and starting a whole load of problems. I even got into a fight with a fellow member, got the both of us suspended for 2 days. I just don't know why I acted up like this. Now I have been overthinking it so much, I've fallen into deep confusion and distress. I'm having sleepless nights due to overthinking, and I just wish I could have presented myself a different way. I did try changing my act, though no one seemed to notice, and I just completely gave up on trying. I genuinely am scared for my senior year. How is everyone going to see me? Do they just secretly hate me but tolerate me? I am constantly fearing for how I'm going to leave my reputation when I graduate. I want to be that senior the underclassmen can rely on. I want them to know I CAN be humble and helpful. It just takes them to hear me out. And I just want to rejuvenate my way of acting and thinking. I hope one day that day will come.

Thanks for reading. Just message me if you want to lend some advice!