My friends called me a narcissist and a manipulative person, but I don
3 of my friends (friends A, B and C) recently took it into social media, and posted a passive aggressive post ‘exposing me of being a manipulative person and a narcissist. The post were screenshots of their conversations with each other back talking about me and how I am an unstable person in relationships.
I dont feel like I am what they portray me to be and I feel betrayed that they felt like they had the rights to post their beliefs of me for everyone to see. I had tried to reach out and apologise to all of them, but theyd ignore it, yet continued to say that it was ME who left them first. I could elaborate this further, but this is the scope of things.
Ive apologised for my mistakes and had tried to act civil and friendly to them, giving them the benefit of the doubt countless of times. I know what I did was wrong and I never intended to hurt them as I have explained to them. I want your opinion on whether not my mistakes justified their decision to act petty and irrationally take it out on social media.
@rolyat49 i am so sorry that they said that i would just move on and try to find other people to talk to they sound not very nice.
@kitkat34567 thanks so much for your reply! I guess im just doubtful of whether or not what im doing or saying right now is manipulative or narcissistic. I went online and did a few research of what a narc is... and although i dont agree that i use or never liked my friends, im worried with how i am facing the situation right now could come across manipulative and narcissistic- Ive apologised to them, but I feel hurt that they had to go onto social media to humiliate me saying things that i dont believe is true. Does that make me a narcissist, and does me trying to reach to people come across as me being manipulative or trying to victimise myself?
@rolyat49 i don't think your a narc you seem nice to me but posting that on soical media is kinda rude and I would think its some form of cyber bullying.
Is this a real post or just a brief theory about narcissism?
@ConfusedIndeed their friends were accusing them of being a narc
I second what has already been said. Public passive aggression doesn't sound like something a grown up person would go for, regardless of whatever caused the feelings that led to the passive aggression. It's sterile, offensive and potentially dangerous for one's reputation from the moment it's put on social media, so it can be very harmful and in no way it can fix or improve things. Therefore, no excuses. Now it's up to you choosing what kind of reaction you want to have
@GhostlyLilian thank you so much for this! I initially thought this as well, but i guess i felt guilty that my mistakes did hurt them. Whether their choices were immoral or not, i guess i felt like i couldn
@rolyat49 FIrst and foremost I noticed that you took ownership for whatever it was that you dome and wanted to offer the other individuals involved an apology, in my opinion, that shows empathy, compassion, and a moral compass that definitely points the opposite direction of narcissism, so kudos for that, that in itself is a big step. In regards to the manipulation, your post (here on 7cups) could definitely be an attempt at manipulation, but I do not think so and I will explain why. Why would someone take the time to go to a website exert their time and energy to get opinions about something they have done just to foster their manipulative tendency (me not knowing if friends AB&C are members of 7 cups and could potentially stumble across your post) My logical thinking tells me that you are genuine and truly concerned about the feelings of the people you wronged and just want to make it right. Now for the tricky part, you mentioned them posting screenshots on the web, while you yourself are doing exactly that with this post (With the understanding that the friends posting stems more from spite/wanting others to attack your character while your attempt stems from a need/want for acceptance that you are not this person they are conveying you to be) With that being said here are my final thoughts: You are human you made a mistake you attempted to offer your regret with no success due to their lack of interaction, as much as it may cause you pain you have to love yourself and allow yourself to know that YOU did all you could to try and remedy the issue (If that is the absolute truth) wash your hands of your mistake take what y,you learned with you and move forward not worrying one more second about people who do not seem to be invested in you as much as you are them. I am truly sorry you are having to go through this, I do think you will come out stronger and better-off by letting it go and placing your time and energy in people who will devote the same energy and time into you!
@Donnap1121 thank you so much for ur in depth analysis. This has given me so much more reassurance and has helped me become more at peace with myself. I was very conflicted about everything, and just wanted to make sure that i had self reflected myself and my actions before coming to the conclusion to try and find better people! Once again thank you for all your reasonings, it has really helped me find closure