are we drifting?
I don't know if it's because I'm getting into another wave of sadness or I'm overthinking it or if it's actually true, but lately I have been feeling like I'm drifting away from all of my friends. I feel like they don't necessarily care about me as much as I care about them and are just friends with me because they pity me or we share friends. I'm not trying to sound mean at all and I don't want them to be in the friendship if they are unhappy or found someone better. I just have the fear of being alone and dont having anyone I can go to or count on. I know that everyone has something going on, so that might be contributing to this strange feeling. I just feel really lonely tbh lately and that I'm only here to be the therapist friend or they don't really want to be friends with me. I hope this doesn't sound mean or self centered or anything, that's not how I was trying to aimd it to seem. I just have been so lonely and I can't go to anyone and I don't know what to do
@smolstrawberries
It's funny, I am contemplating a post on this same topic, the drifting of friendships, in another forum, but haven't quite reached the point of being ready to commit words to it.
You don't sound mean or self-centered or any other kind of similar quality. On the contrary, you sound quite human, natural and understandable and relatable when you describe how you feel. I think of relationships, connection and relating as a basic human need. It may not be the crucial need for water, food, shelter and warmth, but it's the next level up in Maslow's hierarchy of needs. I don't know how to upload images here or I would upload a diagram of that hierarchy of needs (if someone wants to teach me, that would be great! 
).
We are a social species: we need one another at a deep level whether we acknowledge it or not. We feel worse when we're cut off or estranged, or drifting away from our relationships, which leads to a kind of hunger for relating that you seem to be describing.