isolated myself from my friends?
sorry to vent a bit but this has been a weight on my chest for a while now. i think my mental health had affected me so much to the point it made me shut myself away from my friends for nearly a month now. the thing is they have nothing to do with me isolating and this was more of an internal problem with myself. im starting to think im a terrible person for suddenly disappearing with no explanation. my mental health is slowly healing now but it only made me lonelier. i feel like couldve dealt with this better and just vented my problems to them instead but i didnt want to be a burden or make the atmosphere negative so i had to pretend i was fine.
im starting to reflect if i truly deserve my friends because my depression made me unable to give back the same energy they had towards me. i still dont know if they miss me rn or gave up on it, theyve been having fun w each other even without me and im starting to doubt if i really meant that much to them. i want to come back and apologize to them sooner or later but i think my friends deserve someone better than me at this point because i still need to work on myself.
Hey, first of all you're very brave to share this. And no, you are not a terrible person.
I want you to focus on the reason why you're taking this break. You're taking this because of your mental health. You're as important and precious as they're. You need yourself too. 🤍
It's okay to take breaks. It gives you a chance to look within yourself, see your problems from a different point of view and understand yourself better.
Yes, it does make you feel isolated for which I'd recommend you to talk to at least one or two people. Those who are trustworthy and can understand your issues even if they haven't known you since forever. This place can help you with that. 🌻❤️
Healing has no timeline and be prepared for your journey. You're not doing anything wrong. If you're feeling guilty about it, then you can talk to your friends once and tell them you're taking a break for your health and because you really need it. It's good to make it clear to your people. If they're your people then they will understand. If not today, then someday.
Good wishes. You are trying and your efforts matter. You matter. You're allowed to take decisions for yourself. 🤍🌼
Love.
Also, when we're mentally not in a good space then we feel no one understands us and no one's missing us. It may not be true. 🙂
They might be as confused and you. I'm not telling you to be unrealistic but our mind messes with us a lot too.
Even if they don't, you should matter to yourself. You're worth that love and care you give to others and you want to give to others. 🌻
I hope you get better soon.🤍🌼
@quietPond8741 - I really hear you and also empathize with you.
I feel like I've been going through something similar, actually, and I don't think you or I are alone.
I agree with what the earlier commenter said about how sometimes taking a break is necessary for your health.
I also think it makes sense to think about how your friendships make you feel. If you truly are not doing well in these friendships, maybe it could be time to seek other relationships elsewhere.
But just make sure it's an honest, full look at how you feel and not the isolating voice of depression.
All the feelings you've described here are so understandable. Just because you're working on yourself doesn't mean you don't deserve support and love. I think everybody is in some stage of progress all the time, and we need to potential of love to keep moving.