Divorce in a conservative society
If you were in my situation, what would you do? You are a woman living in a very strict conservative society, you made a wrong decision, you marry the wrong person. You realised that you are in an abusive relationship after 2 years of marriage and 7 years of relationship before marriage. You have a 1 year old daughter. You are trying hard to look happy in front of your relatives and friends. But day by day, you are more depressed. You know you would live a happier life with your daughter without your husband. Would you divorce without listening to anyone, or would you live in order not to ruin your daughters, parents and your reputation? Because being a divorced woman in our society, especially when you are 25, makes womens reputation very bad, even if you live alone, even if you dont want any relationship but just live your life with your daughter, even if you dont flirt with anyone, society will look you as if you are "bad woman". Which is harder? To live with that reputation or to live with an abusive husband?
@creativeMaple2916
This is a difficult situation, and I can understand you, because such problems are still big in some places on our planet. But here, it seems to me, there are no two ways around it. On the one hand, there is direct violence and insults every day, on the other hand, there are people's opinions and perhaps not very good attitudes in some cases. And that's it. But you don't live for someone, do you? Plus, all these people, unlike your husband, have nothing to do with you. It will be much easier for you to accept that someone considers you frivolous than to fight against the bad attitude of a loved one. And in the end, if your child has a mentally and physically healthy mother, he will only be happier. Of course, this will not be a matter of one day, but ignoring unnecessary people is a little easier than ignoring a husband who constantly lives nearby. I wish you to get out of this strong and stand firm!
Thank you for your advice. I wish I will get the courage to make the decision soon.
@creativeMaple2916
You said that in your country people usually condemn divorces... But don't they condemn wife battering or physical abuse in general?
In some countries there is the anti-violence "Blue Line": an organisation with their own hotline, which can help you to navigate through every aspect (like therapeutic or legal) of preventing domestic violence.
If you are a victim of physical abuse which leaves marks on your body (like scratches or bruises) or other evidence you might report it to the nearest hospital, and they should make some documentation, possibly informing the local police unit. That could both keep your husband at bay (fearing legal consequences) and give you something to convince most of those ready to call you a "bad woman".
The problem is as long as your child is not in danger of violence from her father, he is outright a parent—just like you—and has the right to see his daughter. That is also the reason why you couldn't go abroad.
How would you solve that problem?
Is it, for instance, possible for you to move to your parents, to be better protected from any misbehaviours of your husband after divorce?
Are you determined to end your marriage, or is you priority to stop the violence?
Have you considered moving out from your husband's place temporarily before you take any irrevocable action?