Exhausted by myself

I'm in a Long distance relationship of 5 years and i have PTSD Because of severe family issues my boyfriend is so nice and calm from the day we met. He's kind of man who let things go after a fight and I'm the one who stretches the issue. He's busy in his life having fun and setting goals hanging out day and nights. But I'm typ of person who only have 2 friends out of which one is my boyfriend. So i feel like a leftover i behave clingy i frustrate him so much even knowing that I'm wrong. I don't like making new friends. I can't go out because of family issues. Some days back out of frustration from daily fights he said the word break up which we have not uttered in our 5 years. It was hurting ofcourse. But ya we figured out saying let's leave this and get back to normal but deep inside i still have the issue i mentioned feeling leftover lacking emotional validation. Now what should I do should i just give him space to kind of miss me and crave me again or should i be in my feminine energy being sweet to him giving him pleasure of having me as a girlfriend.