Expressing my concerns to my SO always turns into a fight.

I don’t know whether it’s the way I approach these talks or if my SO genuinely doesn’t care to participate but I’m at a loss. There is no intimacy between us in any way. Not even our sex is intimate anymore. He doesn’t like to hold my hand, rarely do we cuddle at night, if I don’t say “I love you” first then I won’t hear it from him at all. He lets females flirt with him, he doesn’t reciprocate but he also doesn’t tell them to stop. It’s like he loves the attention. He’s always willing to help anyone with anything the moment they ask but if I ask for help I get put to the back of the list. It hurts, and it’s torture not knowing where his feelings for me stand seen as I literally can’t get him to talk about these concerns I have no matter what I do. It’s 100% of the time turns into a big argument and him thinking I’m putting all the fault on him. So these concerns just go unresolved and the next day he will act like the fight never even happened. It boggles my mind honestly. I’ve left before and he begged and pleaded for me to come home so I did. I don’t get it, I wish he wasn’t so hard to read and I wish I could figure out a way to convince him to open up to me about how he truly feels. I’m so tired…