How Do I Tell My girlfriend that I was sexually Assaulted when I was younger?
Im sorry if this is a heavy topic and if there is a better place to ask it please let me know.
So I have been dating this girl for a couple of months and things are starting to get serious. The thing is I like this girl and I want her to know me. How do I tell her that when I was in High School I was Sexually Assaulted by this bully on the school bus. Like is there a way to ease the way into this conversation.
Follow up question but this girl is also the sister of my best friend. Is there a way to also ask her to not reveal this information to her sister.
@fearless7032
Hello. I am sorry to hear about what you must have gone through... Not to mention the fact that a school bus should be a safe place.
I see quite a complicated situation here. On one hand you would like your girlfriend to know. I think that might be important to ask yourself why you wanted her to know. I guess it can be about trust and vulnerability, with you exposing your wounds to her as your very close person.
On the other hand you seem to be a bit concerned about how she may react and if you could trust to your girlfriend completely. You are worried if this knowledge would not be too heavy on her, and make her share it with her sister, who is your best friend.
I suppose one of the most important areas is such matters are very delicate and maybe should not be discussed out of the blue. But sometimes such conversations start quite naturally, when you discuss various things.
In what way you think your traumatic experience may affect your present day sense of safety, everyday behaviour or current relationship? - that could be the key question. And maybe the answer is the reason why you want your girlfriend to know?
@jacek73
Well im definitely anti-public transportation so thats outcome of that whole event. I guess the reason I want to tell her what happened is because it would help explain some of my behavior like how I get upset when people touch my butt.
But Like I also dont want things to change. I still want her to see me in the same way if that is possible.
@fearless7032
I think we all have the right to keep our boundaries and have some no-go areas, even if they do not result from our negative experience or traumas.
But at the same time it can build our world when we are open to loving and nurturing touch of our beloved ones.
