I got my fairytale ending, but I still really need some help. (Body image/dysmorphia)
I promise that this post is truly positive, but I really need some advice.
My Girlfriend and I will celebrate being officially together for a year this week, and this year has been unbelievably great! I had a ton of anxiety issues trying to ask her out last year, and she had an ex giving her trouble, but she had seen me fumbling around enough trying to ask her out(we were very close friends for more than a year), that she asked me if I wanted to be with her. I was stunned, relieved, nervous, ecstatic, nauseous, and most of all, truly, truly happy.
It's been a great year.
She's brilliant, kind, creative, loving, witty, supportive, beautiful, and her family is amazing! Even when we absolutely disagree with each other, we tend to find common ground and support each other in our perspectives.
I know that was a long intro, but I wanted to preface this with how overjoyed I am to have this woman in my life. This might get very mildly adult in nature, but I would really, really appreciate any input you might have. This means a lot to me
My girlfriend has had some health issues over the years, physical and(no more than most of us) mental health issues. A big one that her therapist brought up last year is dysmorphia, which seems pretty true. She has the prettiest blue eyes, beautiful hair, and other (*achem*) very attractive attributes..., but her health issues have led her to be extremely thin, and tbh she has a very, very flat thin butt. She tries to gain weight, but it only shows up in places that she doesn't want it to, and she understandably finds it endlessly frustrating.
I find her to be so attractive(for a multitude of reasons), like I always have, but it's hard for her to accept that from me without thinking that I'm just being nice...
We had a trip to the beach with her family a while back(that was so much fun!), but she stressed so much about her bathing suit because she can't find one that fits where the bottoms aren't all very loose.
I can tell her truthfully just how attractive she is to me, but it really won't really change entirely how she feels about her own body.
I guess my question to those out there that might have some experience with these sort of body image issues is, what can I do to try to make her feel as beautiful as she is to me? I know the long answer is therapy(which she is in, and has been great for her), but what can I do as her very committed BF to help? I bought her some cute fleece pajamas online tonight (that she'll undoubtedly love), but the thought crossed my mind to buy her some fun undies instead. I know she'd love the idea, but would be so, so self conscious about them that she'd hate it.
I really want her to feel as beautiful, and desirable as she truly is. She knows that I love her completely, and I really want to help in any(if only small) way I can.
If you read all of this, thank you so much, and if you have any thoughts they'd be so appreciated.
Honestly, it sounds like you're doing everything right - bring super supportive and appreciating all her amazing qualities. Basically, her choices are to accept herself the way she is and realize that most women would love to have her problem (though I understand she won't feel that way), or to get some enhancing undies with padded rears. There r some really seamless ones nowadays. Regarding swim suits, she might prefer separate pieces with swim shorts - some r very sexy.
I hope this helps in some way. Good luck, and keep being supportive!