Just…lost

So I know I’m young and all and this might sound dumb—about a month ago the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with blocked me. I’ve known her for three years but we live in different states so for her I agreed I’d wait until we were old enough to move in together to actually be in a relationship. We both have difficult families and were planning to move in together as soon as we could go to college together all that. And I really did try my hardest with this over the screen thing. I found out a month ago that for a month she’d been dating someone she claimed was her best friend. Now look we agreed we weren’t in a relationship and we’d wait but she hid this from me and I also hated this friend of hers because he wasn’t a good person but she’s too nice to see it. I got upset and acted a bit suffocating that week. She blocked me. It’s been a month of on and off texting each other from one of my socials she hadn’t blocked but barely checked. She said she wanted space to figure things out. I was hurt but I really she’s my only friend I don’t talk to anyone else not even my family much so I tried to give her space. Two weeks ago the guy dumped her and she wouldn’t talk to me anymore. Last Saturday she sent me this huge apology saying she’s sorry for lying and how she lost both of us because she lied and that she misses me but she’s can’t have me back in her life because she was scared of messing up again. I begged her to stay but she kept on refusing and eventually I ended up blocking her for her because it’s what she wanted and I really care for her but it’s been two days and I really can’t stop hoping she reaches out to me from some other social. We’re only 16 and even to me it feels like something stupid that I’d hoped for so much but really truly I love her. And I don’t wanna hear “you need to move on” anymore. I can’t. I don’t even have anyone to tell this to. It hurts.