Redemption

I recently came out of a relationship of almost 1 year, because my ex cheated on me. Things had been a bit shaky for us for a few weeks leading up to this but we agreed to talk about it properly after university finals, which are now. He suddenly revealed to mutual friends of ours last week, that he never loved me and had no intent to be with me in the long run and he never felt like I was the one, and now he likes someone else and he gave up on me months ago but just couldn’t say it because he wasn’t sure. I’m losing my mind over the fact that what I fell in love with, wasn’t even a real person it was all an act. And I’m really trying to digest everything that happened. I don’t have words for it but it just feels awful knowing that you loved someone who wasn’t even real, and that they betrayed you. I have always been a closed person, so opening myself up to him fully was a huge step for me and I took that leap of faith because I felt it was right. And now I just feel like a clown. I want to come to terms with this and come past this. I don’t blame him fully, we were in shaky terms already like I said, we both had some problems but I don’t know, maybe his were too much for him to handle so he left. I don’t feel like I can ever trust again because I know now that people can be capable of faking so well, and for such a long time, and you can be a fool to it. Every time I ever had doubts, he would gaslight me. And now I feel like a clown because I should’ve listened to myself and walked away as soon as I knew. But I gave him the benefit of doubt and let it go. I want to move past all this and become a stronger person. This happened to me because I was weak, so I kind of brought it upon myself, I know. Can I get some advice on how to strengthen my emotional stability and just over all, polish myself?