Relationship

Hi. I am looking for emotional and mental health support because I feel like I am struggling to manage my emotions on my own.

I am a college student pursuing B.Com. I would like to explain what I have been going through.

1. Relationship and Emotional Distress

I was in a relationship for almost three years. Before that, he had feelings for me for around 8–9 months.

We have been in a long-distance relationship for approximately two years, and he came to meet me frequently. We used to be emotionally close, and he was one of the very few people with whom I felt safe and comfortable sharing everything.

He was someone I considered my safe place. I trusted him a lot and was emotionally attached to him.

However, things started changing over the past month. He gradually became distant, stopped communicating properly and started responding less frequently.

His close friend passed away in a bike accident around August 2026. After that, he became more withdrawn, but later he seemed okay and became very close to me again. Then, during the last month, he became very busy and started avoiding me. When I asked him about it, he mentioned having family problems and other personal difficulties.

I tried to understand his situation and give him space, even though it was emotionally difficult for me. At the same time, I was also dealing with other family problems, including my alcoholic father. I wanted someone to share these difficulties with, so I tried calling him again.

Eventually, he started saying that he felt pressured by my messages and calls. I tried to reduce communication, but I found it extremely difficult because I was already feeling insecure and emotionally disconnected.

Recently, he told me that he did not want the relationship anymore and wanted to move forward alone. I don't remember his exact words, but I understood it as a breakup.

Since then, there has been almost no communication between us. It happened on October 25th, 2026.

2. Difficulty Accepting the Breakup

Even though I understand that the relationship has ended, emotionally I am unable to accept it completely.

I still miss him a lot. I still love him, and a part of me keeps hoping that he will come back.

I keep wondering whether he will contact me again, whether he misses me, whether he thinks about me and whether there is still a possibility of us getting back together.

I want him back too. This is especially difficult because, in the past, he once said that he wanted to break up and left, but he returned after one month. Because of that experience, I keep hoping that he may come back again this time.

I know I cannot force someone to stay in my life. I also understand that I should maintain my self-respect and not repeatedly contact someone who has chosen to distance himself.

But emotionally, it is very difficult.

Sometimes I want to message him or call him, even when I decide not to.

I also find myself checking things like his online activity and Truecaller activity, trying to understand whether he has blocked or unblocked me.

I know these habits are not helping me, but I struggle to stop them.

There is a constant conflict between my self-respect and my emotional attachment.

3. Overthinking and Anxiety

I overthink almost everything related to him.

I repeatedly think about our conversations, his behaviour, his silence and the things that happened between us.

Sometimes even small things trigger a lot of thoughts.

I find it difficult to control these thoughts. Even when I try to concentrate on something else, my mind goes back to him.

I experience waves of sadness and anxiety. Sometimes I feel emotionally overwhelmed, as if I am drowning in my own thoughts.

I also keep looking for reassurance and clarity because uncertainty is very difficult for me to handle.

4. Changes in My Daily Life

This situation has affected several areas of my life.

- I have lost interest and motivation in many things.

- I struggle to concentrate on my studies.

- Even when I sit down to study, my thoughts distract me.

- I feel mentally exhausted.

- My sleep has been disturbed.

- Sometimes I feel the need to sleep near my mother because I feel emotionally uncomfortable being alone.

- My mood changes frequently.

- I sometimes feel like doing nothing, even when I have important responsibilities.

I have university examinations now, but I am finding it extremely difficult to study.

I feel guilty because I know my education and future are important, but I cannot seem to get myself back on track.

5. My Emotional Attachment

I think I have become very emotionally dependent on this person.

He was one of the very few people I trusted and felt comfortable with.

Now that he is no longer emotionally available, I feel like I have lost an important part of my life.

I don't know how to feel okay without his presence.

I still wish he would return, love me and communicate with me like before.

At the same time, I want to become emotionally independent and stop depending on his messages, calls or attention for my happiness.

I want to be able to live normally again, regardless of what happens in this relationship.

I have been trying to handle everything on my own, but I can't

I don't simply want someone to tell me to forget him or move on.

I want to understand my emotions, manage my attachment, reduce overthinking and learn healthy ways to cope with the breakup.

I want to rebuild my self-esteem, regain my concentration and become emotionally stronger.

I want to feel happy and peaceful again without constantly waiting for someone else's attention.

I would also like to understand whether the emotional changes I am experiencing are related to anxiety, adjustment difficulties or something else that needs professional attention.

I also want him back