does it pain during sexual intercourse ?
ti am a 36 year old virgin because this man i am in relationship with since I was 28 has never had sex with me but has had with other women because till 2021 i was kind of anorexic and after that I became alright but then we are no longer in physical proximity as we were separated as he has been in another country since then for work ....i brought it up that he has had it with other females and not with me and he says it's because he knows i don't want pain and that for any female penatration is painful. I don't know what the truth is as I have never had sex .Is it true that it's painful for all women ? He told me that women are not honest if they tell me it doesn't pain at all . I have heard that it pains first time but I want to know does it always pain ? He says He is not interested in sex either but he still has it with women of they want it with him and are too insistent but he says that it intercourse is always ki d of painful and nobody tells anyone about it because this whole sociyis built in the faulty foundation that pain doesn't exist . Can someone please help me with this by giving honest answers? I don't want pain and if it really pains I want to drop the idea of having it with him and I am not willing to experience this with anyone else even when lot of men seem to be attracted to me . I hope he is not making this up . Not having sex has been an issue in my life since i really wanted it but I cannot have sex with anyone but him.
@optimisticTalker5062
From my experience, unfortunately, it sounds as if your friend was painting a very dark (and not very true) picture of a sexual intercourse.
Sex should not be painful at all, apart from some exceptional situations, like:
- a woman having her first sexual intercourse ever, I mean defloration; it might be connected with a little pain, but this is very individual,
- a woman diagnosed with vaginismus, which can be related to anatomical issues and/or high mental pressure,
- not fully healed stitches after giving a birth to a child,
- a man being not skillful enough, not tender enough (no foreplay), acting either too fast or too aggressively.
But on general a sexual intercourse should be pleasant, soothing and nurturing, not painful to anyone.