Dating more than 1 person ok?
So I met with this person after chatting online, we hit it off and she seems really keen but I'm wanting to take things slow which she is good with. Well my ex and I have been messaging each other for a few weeks now and we went for a walk together as we were both going through stuff. She kissed me and held my hand and I realised I still had feelings. My problem is she has done lots to hurt me in the past and I can't just jump back into a relationship with her. With her my heart has the feels but the head doesn't match. So back to the woman I met, well we are getting to know each other and I want to see where it goes, however should I see how it goes with my ex too? I have only met the chick online once and it's early but I'm not sure what is appropriate when dating these days. Do I explore both options or do I have to decide now which one to explore? I know both a very keen on me and I don't want to hurt them but I don't want to settle either.
Hey there! This is definitely a messed up situation. Generally, it's not wrong to date more than one person at a time as long as you are always honest with them and with yourself. But I find that you should reflect on the fact that we are talking about your ex, not because it is not possible for a couple to get back together after breaking up, but you yourself have written that you have a hard time remembering how much it hurt you. Do you feel you want to give her a chance? Do you feel she has changed? Do you feel it is worth going back with her instead of moving on and meeting new people? There is no right or wrong answer, it depends entirely on how you feel
I feel I need to give the new person a chance as I'm not sure my ex has changed at all. She is back using drugs again too which is definitely not cool with me. Do you think I'm reflecting on my relationship with my ex because dating new people is scary and is pushing my comfort level? As I mentioned before I still care for my ex but my head says different and I need to find someone where the head and heart align. I think just talking this out loud has straightened things out for me.
Hi! I know you're confused about what to do but you should definitely think about why you and your ex broke up. Did you guys break up because you weren't ready for a relationship, uncontrollable factors, or something else that you had a problem with between each other? If you are thinking about your ex, you should consider how long ago the breakup happened, and if she changed or not.
She created drama and said nasty things to me. She was not in the right head space and basically said I was toxic. I confided with others including my psych and they all said she was the problem and showing narcissistic behaviours, this could be why I'm struggling with this connection. I don't know why I'm even considering her and I really think I need to cut those ties but she is trying to reel me in. I know she hasn't changed and I just found out she is using drugs again so huge red flags. The new person is kind and loving and thoughtful and we want the same things in our future....I think I know what I need to do. I'm guessing it's pretty obvious and just talking about it here has helped.