Hating my partner.
I'm back w my partner, who cheated on me more than a year ago. And it's better, he's trying to earn my trust again, he's really trying his best to understand when I feel the ways I do, because of the past. But today I realised that I still have a lot of hate in me about all this. The last time we had a fight, I was really pissed at him and he apologised saying that he needs to be more sentimental, because after the cheating he kind of lost a bit of that, he feels less empathy. He told me that he's slowly even starting to cry again. But often when we get into fights and he's being coldhearted, I just get angry. He tries to calm me down, but sometimes I'm still softly punching the mattress or something and he told me that he knows that I feel anger. Now, even when everything seems to be working out. I feel like wanting to tell him that I hate him, but I'm also really clingy and mostly loving at the same time...
@indigoOrange9898
I get it. I had a similar situation. I realized that I had to either completely forgive my ex and move forward in a way that was more positive or I had to leave him. Otherwise, I was torturing us both. I think the most important thing is to think about what is best for YOU? If you have these feelings toward him, why? Will you ever be able to completely let go of these feelings? And finally, do you think you want him now so he isn't with someone else?
I finally realized that last part was my reason...I want him so no one else had him, but honestly, I didn't really trust or love him the same way. In the end, I left the relationship and while it was hard at first, I am happier than ever now.
thank you. I think I do love him, but am also mostly afraid of him being with someone else. Or other woman being close to him
