I need advice concerning my relationships

Hello all, I’m Toastie Toast. I came here hoping to feel better and gain some advice from people who will listen to me. I have a someone very special to me, we never dated because of long distance (I never minded the distance) but we talked and got to know each other well. He has a history of blocking me, it’s an on and off situation. Right now is the third time he came back after blocking me and we decided to be friends. Deep down, I didn’t want to be friends though. I see him more than a friend. We’ve been chatting for about three weeks now, but suddenly my messages aren’t going through and I’m starting to think he has blocked me again. I don’t want to believe it, but my thoughts are telling me else wise.. and I want to cry because I’m enamored. I love him. I just don’t know what to do anymore because I don’t think I can handle being abandoned by him again when I need him here with me. I don’t know what to do.. so please help ease what I feel..