Is this worth the effort?
I love my boyfriend so so much, but their Relationship OCD makes things extremely difficult for us. It’s hard to be in a relationship with someone who can’t even bring themselves to treat me like an actual partner. It hurts my feelings a lot. I want to try and make it work and I know they love me but it’s so hard when they treat me like an annoyance rather than someone they love. I don’t want to give up but I don’t know how much longer I can handle being this miserable. We are long distance for another 2 weeks which I think is making it worse.
@psratloa
Hi there, I am so sorry to hear that you are having these struggles in your relationship. You mention not feeling like a partner and more like an annoyance ... so I want to share something with you.
In life it is not very often that we are taught about what we should expect and deserve in relationships, we learn from our parents, our peers, and from what we see on the TV.
In my profession I help people who have been or are in abusive relationships. One thing I like to do is to teach them about healthy relationships. so top tips from me coming up....
- We should be treated equally
- Our opinions should be heard and valued and we should listen to our partners also
- We should enjoy spending time together, and also spending time apart
- We should be able to make mistakes without being punished for them and so should our partner
- We should be able to apologise and be apologised to
- Arguments happen, but because there is a problem that we are frustrated with and looking to resolve, not because we are trying to harm one another
- We should be treated with respect and no name calling
- There should never be any put down's or mind games ever
- We listen to one another, and enjoy being together
I am not saying that you are in an abusive relationship, I don't know enough about your situation, but most importantly if you are unhappy please know that you do have the right to make decisions about your future. So if it is not working for you, then there is life and a future out there for you without this person 🌷