Marriage woes
My marriage has hit rock bottom, I’ve been with him for 11 years and married for 7, we have a 3 year old daughter. I care about him a lot but I feel like we are only friends, I don’t feel attracted to him or in love with him any more and I haven’t been for quite some time, a fact he now knows - we are having counselling next week which I am really nervous about.
i admit I have made a lot of mistakes and I’m not perfect - I have issues myself where I find it extremely hard to talk about it and communicate, I’m also so afraid of causing upset and having conflict - I don’t know what to do.
I’ll be honest and say I don’t think counselling will help us stay together - I don’t see how it can make me attracted to him again or fall in love with him again, but I hope it helps us communicate effectively and work through things in a calm way.
has anyone got any advice or been through similar?
I feel like I’m going through the same thing but I’m in your husbands shoes. I’ve been married 13 years and these last few months have been rocky. She’s in a position where she’s questioning our relationship. She says she still loves me but doesn’t know if that’s enough. I want to work and continue growing with her. We haven’t tried therapy yet but it’s in the works as we have been told it does help.
Right now she is so closed off. There’s a wall she has put up and it really gets to me. Communication is key and you guys should talk. Healthy communication , I know that’s the hardest but that’s what I wish I had. I always feel like space just allows more space. Marriage isn’t something you can just quit. It takes work, lots of work. We are so easy to just let things go, especially now a day with social media and motivational quotes saying let go and stuff like that. It’s hard to let go but it’s even harder to stay and work and continue working the rest of your life. Roads will be smooth some days other days they’ll be rocky. some days they will be too rocky where you just want to get off and give up. But that’s what makes something valuable.Your marriage is valuable as are you and your husband. Relationships are like a young plant. You can’t expect it to grow and stay alive if you don’t give it what it needs.
