me and my boyfriend
me and my boyfriend are about to be juniors in high school. basically we’ve been fighting constantly for months and ive felt drained. and whenever i bring it up he freaks out and i just i guess finally came to the realization i dont wanna keep dealing with that. not to mention we just don’t fit each other. we both talk a lot but dont like to listen. stuff like that. it’s not that there’s anything wrong with him or he’s bad but he doesn’t suit what i need in a relationship. some girls like super jealous and stuff. i don’t enjoy that. he wants someone jealous and protective but im not like that. like he got upset i was too close to a guy in a picture and flipped out yelling at me. that’s another thing. we both have a temper. we can’t deal with that. we need someone calm. because all we do is make it worse. we’ve had too many arguments about this and have broken up three times in the last week. what should i do?
@greenFarm7319
What you’re feeling is completely valid — and honestly, really mature. You’ve taken a hard look at the relationship, and you’re realizing that even though you care about him, it’s just not working anymore. That takes courage and self-awareness, especially at your age.
Here’s the truth:
You don’t have to stay in a relationship that’s draining you, even if the person isn’t “bad.” If constant fighting, yelling, jealousy, and mismatched needs are becoming the norm, it’s okay to say: “This isn’t healthy for either of us.”
You’ve already broken up three times in one week — that’s your heart trying to let go. Sometimes, the hardest part isn’t knowing what to do... it’s giving yourself permission to do it.
So here’s what I’d suggest:
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Be honest, but kind. Let him know that while you care about him, this relationship isn’t giving either of you what you need — and dragging it out is only hurting you both.
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Don’t second-guess yourself. If your peace has been gone for a while, you’re not giving up — you’re choosing to heal.
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Set boundaries after the breakup. Especially if tempers flare or the back-and-forth continues, it’s okay to take space.
You’re both still growing, learning, and figuring out what love should feel like. And sometimes, the bravest thing is letting go with respect — so you can make space for something better later.
I’m here if you want help figuring out how to say it or what to do after. You’ve got this 💛
@greenFarm7319
“What should i do?”
It seems you already have the answer.
“It's not that there’s anything wrong with him or he’s bad but he doesn’t suit what i need in a relationship.”
Plus, you have a very good attitude and perspective. There are positives and "negatives” when you're matched up with someone different from you vs. the same as you. Have you had that before? I know you have plenty of time to explore, but it might be interesting. Or your save yourself the stress of a relationship and focus the next two years improving parts of yourself (like here on 7Cups) … or keeping up your studies (especially being a junior).
Best wishes on a peaceful end to your summer 👓 🌳