A breakup with no social support
Hello,
its been about 5 months that someone meaningful has walked out of my life. Long story short it was due to too much fighting and it got toxic. While in this relationship we have both lost contact and distanced ourselves with people. At the same time I chose to stop hanging out with certain people. Now that she is gone I have been depressed and very lonely for over 5 months. Waking up is still a. Struggle and I rarely talk to anyone anymore. Except for my mother. Is this A normal situation for those who have been through it? Feeling lonely after and not having anyone to turn to. I do have people to turn to but I chose to distance myself because they were not right people for my life. I still have the urge to message her to send my peace because I have not responded to her last message
@Ken07 hi there, we are so proud of you for sharing with us, that takes courage. First of all, yes! You are normal and your feelings make complete sense. Keep in mind everyone handles this type of situation differently. It sounds like you have put the people that are not right for you on hold, which to be honest I have recently done. On the other hand, we all need support. It's great that you have your mother and please remember that we are always here for you. I am sorry that you had to go through a breakup, those are never easy. I know that it is difficult to wake up and carry on but you have so much strength for getting to today - keep going. You have everything it takes to get through this. If you would like to chat more, please feel free to message me. I am here for you. You will find the right people in the right time. I know it is sometimes hard, but have faith friend! xo
@calidescopeheart
Don't get me wrong but I rather appreciate if someone doesn't give me fake hope that have faith and things will work out.
After 35 years of life if you are not successful then just change your course and do something that works.
@diplomaticCoconut6613 I did not intend to give you any such advice, I was speaking to another member. I am here to provide support. It sounds like you have given up on something. I'm sorry to hear that that something did not work out for you. I did not say that anyone should sit in a corner and have a blind faith that things will automatically get better. It is a long and effortful process to get most things that are worth it. I was merely telling a friend not to give up. It hasn't been 35 years for everyone. And even so, some people find something that works better, some people keep going. I cannot possibly know the battles you are facing but if you care to chat about it, feel free to message me. Take care and good luck.
@diplomaticCoconut6613 fake hope is only fake if you have no hope. To some it is actually very real.
@calidescopeheart
Sorry my experience in world of hope is very bitter and no I don't want to talk about what I have been through cause it is a waste of time.
I believe on hard work and understanding how someone can use me for their own benefit. So that I can avoid these people.
Thanks for the offer though.
@diplomaticCoconut6613 it sounds like it is still making you unhappy. If you change your mind I am here. That is actually why I am here.
@calidescopeheart
I feel safe rather unhappy then being happy. Cause I am living in reality not in perception.
@diplomaticCoconut6613 everyone deserves to be happy - if you are happy with how you are living that is wonderful. I am not here to tell you what should make you happy and what shouldn't. Everyone is different and different things make different people happy.
@diplomaticCoconut6613 I too believe in bard work but I think there is more to it than understanding who to avoid and who not to avoid. People are complex beings. It is usually worth understanding what is beneath the tough exterior.
@calidescopeheart
Been there done that. I love Electronic and programming rather having cuddling with opposite of sex.
@diplomaticCoconut6613 that's awesome. I'm glad you found something you enjoy. To each their own!
@calidescopeheart
I do but I regret why I wasted so much time in learning people and wasting my life in relationship.
Definitely, I was mislead by Humans.
@diplomaticCoconut6613 we are all misled a little by people and life! Our expectations very seldom meet reality. I think that is a part of life. What exactly do you regret? I think everyone wastes time, it's just a matter of how you perceive/rationalize it. Some people say if you learned from it then it wasn't a waste or something like if you went through it then you are probably stronger now.
@calidescopeheart
I am definitely stronger, if you give me a gun and ask me to put it over my head and pull a trigger. I can do it in split second.
@diplomaticCoconut6613 do you think that makes you strong? You said you regret, what do you regret?
@calidescopeheart
oh yes it makes me stronger try it your self if you got a revolver put a bullet in one chamber and revolve the chamber as fast as you can once it stop put a gun over your head and pull the trigger. Believe me it requires great courage to do that.
@diplomaticCoconut6613 I don't wish to die. I would rather not.
@calidescopeheart
I told you what I regret that I believe on human that mislead me to wrong path for their own benefit .
@diplomaticCoconut6613 if you would like to continue our chat via 1-1 message feel free to send a message. Take care.