A new start

So I thought I should share my story finally, with completely honesty. It will be a year and some change now since I have gotten out of a physically and emotionally adusive relationship. That terrible relationship was controlling and I was too young and lasted for 3 years (too long for sure). When it finally ended, I gave up my entire life, my dog, my friends, my place, and moved back in with my parents to finally start college. It took me awhile to get the hang of everything again. Its a cruel feeling missing someone who hurt you so much. But eventually I found ways to get past and move forward. Ive focused on myself and my depressive states, worked on being a better person who I love and it has been hard, but Im still here. For the first time in my life, I have experienced being with someone who genuinely cares about me and supports my goals. This will be the first relationship I have been in since my traumatic experiences. And it feels too good to be true sometimes. I think I am ready, but I get so much anxiety about putting everything I have into someone elses trust and it falling through again. Im worried that if something goes wrong again, that will be it for me and relationships. I am so thankful for my S/O, and I am so thankful for how far I have come with my communication skills and coping mechanisms. But Im still feeling confused about how much I can let myself go into this. If youve read this far, thank you for listening, it really does mean the world to me just to tell someone any of this.