Attachment disorder and relationships

Anyone here who suffers from depression together with an attachment disorder (anxious )?

I d like to discuss the aspect of relationships (in my case non existent for many years).

So far at various points during therapy with different professionals the recurrent theme seems to come up that I will be unable to enter into a relationship unless I can resolve some things and especially learn to live myself.

It feels quite harsh as having lived with major depressive disorder for over 20years the main work it has done is to increase self loathing and to lower self esteem.

For some reason I still somehow kept trying but I'm always rejected / seen as a friend.

Yet the longing for human touch was the last thing I had before this episode stole all feelings and turned it into nothingness.

Being connected even if for a short while seems is often the only vital force I feel helps me. But I also know each rejection is devastating.

At moment I have lost all interest in life during this ongoing depressive relapse.

Should I really just forget about the possibility of any relationship or is there something healthy in me which is still wanting to try and find a reason for living and calling my attention?

I deleted my profiles two months ago after yet another failed dating attempt.