Confused
I have a lot of change and stress at the moment. New role in my business which is very demanding, I split from my ex of 10 years about a month ago, have gone from being very financially comfortable to now supporting the mortgage by myself, living alone and to add to it I suffer with insomnia which has gotten even worse recently. I average about 3 hours a night 6 days a week. Oh and someone hit my car and drove off yesterday which is always a nice cherry on top.
I'm a strong person, usually very closed, but the above is all getting a bit much.
With regards to the split from my ex I have to be honest that loosing her didn't really effect me. I haven't been happy in years, we grew apart. After a bit of reflection I felt more relief than anything. It was more an adjustment to not having someone around.
Then I met someone new, very quickly. I went into it with a get back out there mentality, have some fun. But we have really hit it off, she's incredible and makes me feel alive again. We have only been dating for a very short time, like 2 weeks. It's been fairly intense though. However more and more I notice my emotions intrinsically linked to her which isn't healthy. For example, she has been very aloof and cold today and I have felt more anxiety about it then I did when the ex left. Surely there not right or healthy?? I love the highs I feel with her but I'm struggling with a huge amount of stress and confusion.
Help.
@adventurousKite9415
Hi. It does sound like you have a lot on your plate in terms of change, and although it is good change, it can stilla dd to our stress in terms of adjustment. The sleep is certainly a concern since we dont function at our best emotionally, physically, etc, without proper sleep, you know that. The relationship struggles in terms of emotions can be directly related to your sleep since emotions are much harder to regulate when we dont get enough sleep. I would look into something to help you sleep- meditation, deep theta meditation, etc and see how that helps you regulate your emotions before you start focusing too much on the relationship as the main cause.
@adventurousKite9415
It might be abit too late to say this now but while having so much stress and so little sleep, dating was probably not too great an idea. Especailly after a break up, being "finally" free to be out there again is probably what got you hooked on her so fast, after 10 years you must be excited to start new again :) which is great! But possibly detrimental to your current state of stress. Perhaps she allows you to relax and finally find sleep again, but maybe being affected by her a lot (getting anxious when she is cold (even if she may not intend to be)) is not too great of a thing to help you back on your feet. Make sure to take one step at a time and not try to get everything done and dealt with at once.
Insomnia... I heard exercise helps, exhausting your body and then fall into a refreshing sleep.
Take care and best of luck :)