Falling too quickly

Quick back story - I'm 43, was married for 3 years, divorced for 6 years now (mutual divorce, still cordial, no kids).

Since my divorce I've been in 1 serious relationship, a rebound, on again off again, got engaged, called it off 3 years ago.

I've dated a few guys since but it always seems like I end up sabatoging things. After a few dates I fall hard and fast, I become clingy, I lose myself to make sure he is happy. Things last for a few months, then I get ghosted. Its happened three times in three years.

Just recently I went out with a guy a few times, we really hit it off. We talked about our insecurities, we both have them, and how important communication is. It seemed like a great match. Then I got upset when he backed out on a few dates. When he didn't respond to me reaching out to him, I panicked and I sent a long text, telling him how I felt. And of course I haven't heard from him since. I know I messed things up, I sabatoged something that could have been really good. I try to talk to my friends about it and they just tell me I get too serious too quick, I scared him away.

I feel like I'm in this horrible cycle and I can't figure out how to stop it. I feel like an idiot at this whole dating thing. I want someone to like me for me, damaged goods and all, but I feel like if I'm being myself, I scare guys away.

Does anyone else have issues falling to quickly or pushing a serious relationship too quickly? Or am I alone and will continue to be alone?