Hiding porn

Anyone ever dealt with the betrayal of porn? It's not so much the porn it's the hiding deleting of it. Then on top of that I found blogs that talked about women's tit rings. I also discovered how he talked about women as sex objects including myself his wife. Then he had a gaming problem and would yell at me if I spent 1.00 but he was spending upwards of 60 sometimes on stupid games. I lashed out about everything and for posturing he went up to see a lawyer spent 2,500 dollars to show me divorce papers that he had no intention on going through with. I have no family or friends. We have been married 15 years and do everything together. I feel he is a psycho. My reality is being torn apart. How can I trust him? All the good times seem like a lie. We are each other's best friend.