How Can I Trust Him Again?
I started dating my boyfriend early December. We met on Tinder, and honestly we hooked up the first date. I asked him if he wanted to stay friends after, and he said why would he? So a couple days later, we made it official. We spent every other day and all weekend with each other - we did everything together. A couple weeks later, I started letting my 2 year old son go around him. They instantly bonded. Around the same time, I get a message from a girl on Facebook saying that my boyfriend had sent her nudes. She provided a screenshot and everything. I drove an hour and a half from home (we lived away from each other) to confront him that night. He said he was drunk and that he had issues with attention with women, and that it started in highschool. I forgave him and said don't do it again.A week later he leaves his phone on the table and goes to the store. I'm curious, so I open it and go through some things. Around the same time he sent the girl a nude, he messaged a couple girls over and over, none replied. He said things like "hey bbg" "hey" etc. Then I found on Snapchat where he had asked a girl where she worked at because she posted on her story a picture of a restaurant. I went to the beginning of the conversation and he had slid up on a bikini pic of her way before us getting together and said "oof".
When I had confronted him about asking the girl where she worked at, his first excuse was "I wanted to take you to eat there", then it was "I don't know". He said
hey there. i'm sorry to hear of your situation. i'd like to share some thoughts with you, perhaps they can be of help.
it sounds like you guys had a good time and clicked; but it also sounds like you're making a significant effort to justify his behaviour to yourself. it might be true that he has been really good for you and you have been good for him, however it's also true that he has let himself slip along the way while you haven't. the thing is, there's no sure-fire way or an easy fix that will restore your trust in him. he has to work on that himself. the longer he spends proving his commitment to you, the more you will be able to let your guard down. i would seriously question, if i were you, whether i should let my guard down any sooner, for his benefit. i'd say from his recent actions (getting a job, saving up for you guys) he might have definitely decided this is what he wants. but he needs to understand that since he let himself go in the past, he needs to work harder to earn back this trust now, and then build it into something stronger.
stay strong, and consider your next steps carefully, for your own good and your child's. there's no need to be overly suspicious. but don't give any free passes either. good luck!