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How to deal with crushes!

March 4th, 2017

There's this guy in our college who knows that I have a kinda sorta crush on him but he doesn't give a shit about me. What do I do about it? We used to be really close before. But now, he's past the point of caring.

4
March 4th, 2017

@AshleySprings

Honestly? It's better to move on from those who do not care about you. It's one thing to crush on someone who may not like you, it's quite another to be with that person and think they did. That's a far worse fate, believe me.

If you aren't sure if he does actually like you or not, I'd suggest two ways of going around this. First, you could let him come to you and show interest. If he doesn't, at least you can feel better knowing that you didn't chase a guy who wasn't interested. Another way you could find out if he likes you is to ask him out for coffee or lunch. If he's interested in getting to know you, he'll say yes. If not, well at least you tried and found out how he feels. It's definitely scary to do that though and I'd only suggest it if you are truly unsure if he does like you. If you're fairly certain he doesn't, perhaps the direct way would not be the best plan.

Just remember, just because someone may not like you or have interest in you, that does not reflect your desirability to someone else. Sometimes things just don't work out the way we want it to and that's alright. You're worth finding someone who won't make you question their feelings for you and I'm sure they're out there. Good luck! smiley

3 replies
March 4th, 2017

@TrueArrow The thing is he tries so much with other girl but with me he just keeps testing me. Something like pushing me until I break......... He always waits for me to talk to him. Even then he is so nonchalant. There are so many mixed signals. Once (lots of times!) I heard him saying his friends that I don't give a shit about him..... I was like, lol, someone's rewriting history here...... But again when I try he just walks off in the opposite direction not even sparing me a glance. WTF?

2 replies
March 4th, 2017

@AshleySprings

Why do you think he could be testing you? Is there some sort of insecurity he could be dealing with (like he is shy) or is he normally fine with asking girls out? It sounds like he may have interest, have you considered asking him out first? Perhaps if you're the first to ask, he may say yes. Or you could spend more time with him to see if he will ask you out or peak his interest more. It all depends on what you are comfortable doing and if you think he's worth it enough to pursue then I'd say go for it! At least you won't be left with wondering what could have been.

1 reply
March 4th, 2017

@TrueArrow Nah. He is pretty smooth with other girls but with me all he does is stare. He looks at me quite a lot in class...... I only noticed it when he sat in the front row and me in the back............ But I don't know if it's to satisfy his ego that I'm never gonna ditch him no matter how apathic he is....... or he's really interested in me.

And about that talking...........well, he chats up another girl as soon as he sees me.....😯

And something happened today, he sorta likes (?) a girl, let's call her Bella. And that girl just snubbed him off today. We (That guy's, Bella's (both of them share the aane friend circle) and my friend group) usually get together in the evenings. He walked away as soon as he saw her. And I was right behind her........ (both of us were coming at the same time!). Did he leave because of me or her? We aren't on good terms since two months. (Not even HIs. Just blank stares)......... And I don't get why he gives so much shit about her when he doesn't give a damn about me............ What did I even do for people to be so indifferent anyway. And this is the second time this sorta triangle crush thing is happening. And this time I wanna do it right. Any advice?

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